Before becoming a parent I googled normal things like; How many calories in a glass of wine? Pictures of Gerard Butler. Where is Andy Crane now? Since becoming a parent my google history has changed somewhat, and I have found that the things that parents google are normally strange and often hilarious.
I myself have seen things that can never been unseen by googling What does chickenpox / veruccas / headlice look like? I’ve entered the realms of Mumsnet hell and felt like the worse parent in the world for googling Three year old not yet potty trained.
There have been random questions when Cbeebies has melted my brain such as What is flop? I’ve decided on whether to buy pets based on How long does a goldfish live? And I’ve been super-mum when google has helped me answer Why can Superman fly, but batman can’t?
I think in may ways our parents had it easier than us, without the constant stream of ‘how to bring up your kids’ advice that is thrown at us today. They didn’t have to worry about car seats, feeding us our organic five a day, and providing a balance of educational and fun craft activities for us to partake in. BUT! They did not have google to turn to at three am when your newborn has been guzzling at your boob like it’s happy hour.
The Things That Parents Google
For your entertainment, I asked some fellow bloggers what are things that parents google? And these were the hilarious responses:
“Two year old with green poo” – It was purple dye from a birthday cake he’s had an nurser, it turns poo green! I mean BRIGHT green! Squats Sass and Saggy Skin
“My toddler refuses to poo, what do I do?” Porridge and Parenting
“Black worm things in baby poo” – Seriously freaked me out, but it was from eating bananas! Bare Mother
Is pink fluff in poo normal?
Turns out he’d been chewing his Cookie Monster toy!! Crummy Mummy
“Is my child Maggie Thatcher?” – I was very sleep deprived at the time and do have a habit of googling random things, but my 7 year-old still doesn’t sleep properly. She can survive on 4 hours sleep just like Maggie. Island Living 365
“How long can you survive without sleep?” Maisy Meow
“Will my baby ever sleep?” Miracle Max
“Can you die from sleep deprivation?” Raw Childhood
Eating & Drinking
“My toddler drank toilet water.” Arthur Wears
“Are fake fire coals toxic?” Someone’s Mum
“Is it harmful to eat glitter” Just Average Jen
“Can my child survive on yogurt and Quavers?” Country Heart and Home
“Will dog food poison my child?” Five Little Doves
Is Sudocrem poisonous?
– After my daughter plastered it all over her face, the living room carpet, her clothes and everything else she came into contact with. The Daisy Pages
“Toddler eating paint will she be ok?” Ankle Biters Adventures
“6 week old baby no eye contact does she love me” – After a particularly emotional day!! Mouse Moo and Me too
“Why won’t my toddler wear clothes?” Mummy’s Diary
“Baby born with wonky nose..will it straighten?” Ready Freddie Go
“Is it normal for a three year old to hump a blanket?”
Apparently it’s quite common! Twinderelmo
“What does a spider bite look like?” – And yes, it turns out even the Uk has spiders that bite. Edinburgh Life With kids
“Swollen baby penis” – I seriously don’t advise doing this! Rock and Roll Pussycat
“Will my child get sick if they lick a dirty poo stained window at a zoo” – Obviously a silly question to ask google because of course she did! Motherhood: The Real Deal
“What’s the best way to remove raisins stuck up 3 year olds nose?” – Extraordinary amount of helpful tips! Family Travel With Ellie
“What do you do when they won’t apologise, naughty step?” – I was googling in the next room while my daughter was sitting defiantly on the stair. I literally had no clue what to do! Pink Pear Bear
“How to get wee smell off a new carpet” – Not the most glam but potty training! Mum Muddling Through
“Do pirates like to eat cereal for breakfast?” – My 4 year old needed to know. Unfortunately Siri didn’t know the answer. Mummies Waiting
“Can babies have dentures?” Plutonium Sox
How about you? What’s the weirdest thing you have googled since becoming a parent?
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