Of course there are other signs. University days suddenly seem like a long time ago and not like yesterday. They were a long time ago. The babies being born when I graduated have just left school. I actually groaned typing that sentence. The grey hairs that seem to be sprouting by the day. The fact that my body doesn’t recover from a hangover with a fry up and hair of the dog. It now requires three days of solitary confinement. Near on impossible, so the effects can be felt for a full week.
But I’ve noticed other signs that I am rapidly approaching my fourth decade and not feeling quite as youthful as I once did. So here are my 10 signs you are in your thirties:
1 The Radio
I remember thinking in my twenties that I would always listen to Radio One and never succumb to Radio Two. But nowadays Radio One seems like a lot of loud noise and makes me feel very out of touch. The first preset on any radio is now Radio Two. Yes I still have a radio.
I have no idea whose who in the latest boy band. In fact I couldn’t tell you which band sings which song. My once superior pub quiz knowledge of pop has now been relegated to the golden oldies or retro years. I still miss Top of the Pops.
I know trends come back, and I’ve worn things that were fashionable when I was a teenager. All be it with sleeker hair, less acne and a larger waistline. However when trends come back into fashion that you felt you were too old to wear the first time round it’s sad times.
4 Cover Songs
The signs you are getting old seems to come in stages when it comes to artists covering songs:
- Stage One – You remember it the first time
- Stage Two – You owned the original on vinyl
- Stage Three – You owned the original on CD
- Stage Four – You own both the original and the first time it was covered on CD
- Stage Five – The original gave you a headache and you can’t believe someone has actually covered that crap.
5 Your kids think you’re ancient
Maybe it’s because they can work the DVD player (yes we still have one of those too) better than you, but they ask you things about the olden days and if you knew Guy Fawkes. Remember who feeds you kids.
6 Fashion confuses you
When you pick something off the rails and are unsure if it’s a dress or a top or which way round it goes, it’s time to leave New Look.
7 You don’t keep up with the Kardashians
8 Netflix & Chill means something entirely different
In your world Netflix & Chill means watching half a movie on the sofa before you fall asleep and wake up when the credits roll. In fact you only found out the real meaning when your husband told you. And he doesn’t know this because he’s cool and trendy, but because he works in an office where there are cool and trendy people significantly younger than him. Sorry husband. x
9 You find yourself having to bite your tongue
Especially when you see teenager with a fringe so long it’s a wonder they can see and trousers so low they are mooning you. Although they probably don’t call them moonies anymore.
10 Terminology has changed
You have to google things such as YOLO to find out what they mean and then wanting to slap anyone that uses it.
Of course it’s not all bad. Being in your thirties often brings more confidence than you had in your twenties and a brilliant ability to filter out bull shit. I’m quite content to leave the crazy weekends to the twenty somethings in favour of cosy evenings in with a bit of Netflix & Chill 😉
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