Kids and wheels, it seems are inseparable. It starts before they are even born, when you choose their first set of wheels that you will be pushing them around in for the foreseeable future.
Before you can blink they are zooming around with baby walkers and bashing into your ankles. Then suddenly a whole new world of wheels opens up to them, and you find yourself going greyer by the minute as you navigate the scrapes, bruises, near misses and A&E visits that go with kids and wheels.
So here is my parents guide to the wheels you and your kid will navigate through their childhood.
Dolls prams / Trolleys
It all starts very cute as they push their favourite doll or teddy around in a little pushchair. A pushchair that they will abandon at any shiny or colourful distraction, leaving you to carry the pushchair home and wonder about their future as a responsible adult.
Scooters
It’s fairly easy for them to master the scooting. Not so easy for them to master the ‘Stop command’. Especially toddlers who sense their first chance of freedom, and suddenly develop speed scooting skills that make Lewis Hamilton look slow. Leaving you to chase after them screaming “Mummy said STOP”. When you finally catch up with them having gone in the opposite direction of where you want to go, they decide they don’t want to scoot anymore and you end up being the designated scooter carrier.
As they get older the three wheel scooters turn to stunt scooters and electric scooters, so the grey hair moments don’t get any easier!
Bikes
I find kids fall into two categories when learning to master the art of bike riding. Those that master it in under 30 minutes, like my youngest. And those that take 30 days, like my eldest (took after his Mum). Thirty long days of backbreaking labour for you, whilst you hold the saddle and run along behind them in a very unnatural crouched position shouting ‘Pedal, Pedal, PEDAL’. Other phrases you might not be expecting to shout frequently include, “look where you are going”, “steer” and “BREAK!”
The pride when they master it is amazing though.
Then you have to reach a point where you are brave enough to let them cycle on the roads.
Skates
I always dreamed of zooming around on skates and spinning like I was in a Body Form advert. Sadly any attempt always ended in accidental splits or a bruised bum. My kids are so far taking after me. Much to the husband’s disgust, who as it happens skates better than he can walk.
Skateboards
Don’t be fooled into thinking that your kid will come to know harm by sitting on their skate board. That’s how my little brother cut his chin open when we were kids. It was a blood bath!
The problem with kids mastering this particular set of wheels is that they then want to go to the skate park, which I am a) not cool enough for, and b) don’t have the nerves of steel required. “Be careful sweet heart”. So uncool.
Hover Boards
When we saw hover boards in Back to the Future Part 2, we all wanted one. We never dreamed we could be as cool as Marty McFly in our lifetime. Hover boards were a distant dream. But it seems dreams can come true. And we are all quite frankly seething that our kids, who have no idea who Marty McFly is, have mastered it quicker than us, with little effort, and look infinitely cooler than us on a hover board.
Heelys
Do you remember when these were all the rage. The shoes with wheels in the heels, making walking effortless. Every kid in a supermarket had them, and every twenty to forty year old wished they had them, they looked so cool.
There are a lot of wheels for kids and parents to master. That’s without the non wheel items such as pogo sticks. Which in case you are thinking of getting one should come with a noise warning. “One” boing, “Two” boing, “Three” boing, “Four” boing, “Five” boing, “Six” boing. My sons current target is 120. It’s sending me slowly insane! Can we just use our own two feet for a while?
Of course the next step involves a driving licence and a whole new set of wheels to navigate. Might as well just go grey gracefully at this point.
This post is sponsored by Skates
Skates.co.uk is the UK’s specialist wheeled sports shop! They stock all the top brands, products, parts, protection, and accessories for Stunt Scooters, Mini BMX Bikes, Skateboards, Longboards, Roller Quad Skates, Inline Skates, Ice Skates alongside the helmets, production pads, and bags. It’s the go to place for anything your kid has with wheels!
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