And I Forgave Him
We’ve been married for 11 years. Together for 23. Childhood sweethearts. He is my everything, my best friend, my rock. The one person who knows me better than anyone else.
I though I knew him. I thought he was the one person who would never hurt me, who would never let me down. I never thought he was capable of this. He has made us a statistic. One of the 46% of couples* who have cheated on their partner.
I always thought I would never stay with a man who cheated. But you don’t know until it happens to you how you will react. It’s easy to believe you could be the person that doesn’t accept betrayal. That somehow forgiveness makes you weak. But 23 years of history. Memories. A house. 2 children. It’s not so easy to let all that go.
He confessed everything. We had a huge fight. We both said things we shouldn’t have. I didn’t want to know the details. He wanted to tell me everything. He said he was sorry. That it would never happen again. He begged for my forgiveness.
I kept hearing a voice inside my head. “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” I doubted him. Was it really a one off? 81% of cheaters* cheat multiple times. The odds were stacked so high against him.
I blamed myself for a while. He had wanted to indulge with me that night but I had said no. I was too tired. A day full of “Mummy” “Mummy” “Mummy” and I wanted some space for myself. I hadn’t for-filled his needs.
I kept thinking of all the times we had spent in the lounge together. Evenings snuggled on the sofa in our little bubble. Now those memories were tainted by his actions.
For a while I wondered if I should do the same thing, make him feel the way he had made me feel. I had the opportunity. He went out for the night, the kids were asleep, I had the house to myself. A glass of wine in my hand. It would have been so easy. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t press the button. I always watched Homelands with him and I couldn’t imagine it any other way. I didn’t want it any other way.
So I did the only thing I could. I forgave him for giving into temptation and watching ahead. I had to trust that although he has been a #Netflixcheat, he has regretted his actions and won’t repeat them. He knows he was wrong.
I know there are other relationships that have survived this and I believe mine will too. Especially with a little help from Micheal Bolton.
64% of Uk couples believe that their partner won’t watch ahead. Yet 67% of Brits admit that they would cheat more often if they thought they could get away with it*.
The top 4 shows to cheat with in the UK are:
1 Breaking Bad
2 American Horror Story
3 House of Cards
4 Orange is The New black
Has your other half ever watched ahead? What about you, are you a #Netflixcheat?
*Figures from a Netflix survey conducted by SurveyMonkey in December 2016 and based on 30,267 responses.
I am part of the Netflix Stream Team. This is a collaborative post.