Rookie Misrtakes Large

Rookie Mistakes is a series where guest bloggers divulge their parenting fails, and make us laugh or inspire us in the process.  So whether your little one has been walking around using the f word after Daddy’s unfortunate road rage incident, or you have left the camel nativity costume to the last minute and it’s looking more like a horse, rest assured that we’ve all been there. 


This weeks guest post is of a festive theme, and comes from a longtime favourite blogger of mine,  Jess who blogs at Wry Mummy.  As it’s Christmas we’ve turned things on their head and Jess is giving us some great advice on how to avoid Rookie Mistakes when hosting a New years Eve Party.  And let’s face it, we are never going to afford sitters on New Years Eve so the only way we can celebrate is to host a party.  (Although falling asleep on the sofa before Big Ben chimes is also a perfectly acceptable means of celebration).  

Lifeloveanddirtydishes Life Love and Dirty Dishes




Profile pic 1H2015 edited

Bio: Jess is a mum of three, master of none. She started her blog Wry Mummy in the middle of the night as no one was awake to laugh at her take on sluicing baby sick off sheets. The only thing that got her through was the hope that upstairs her husband would be inhaling germs from their baby as he cuddled him in the glory role.
She never fails to be amazed by the ludicrous and / or wonderful situations parenting puts you into and her blog is a reflection of this. To her delight and amazement, her wryness won her BritMums’ Brilliance in Blogging award this year for Family. 
A very happy Christmas to the lovely Claire and her readers!



Hosting Hacks for NYE


Create a booze’n’snacks smokescreen. I cannot stress this enough. Nothing draws the eye like a glinting wineglass and a bowl of tortilla chips – while the guests dip, they won’t notice the tip.


Wear an apron = instant hostess. For added effect, dust your cheek with a becoming dab of flour, implying you’ve just made your own pastry.


Have a steadying drink. But open a new bottle when the guests come – it makes them feel special. And stops them suspecting that you’re already two sheets to the wind.


Hide the sick bucket, toilet unblocker, fly spray, Immodium, Calpol, nit shampoo, dirty nappies and any other indicator that all is not well in your household.


Dress yourself before the house. Would you rather be told your skirting boards are immaculate or that you look great? Ditch the mop until you’ve done your mascara. If you don’t manage to do the floor, pretend your kid just spilled a drink that minute. Rather that than they go away saying, “Doesn’t she look old?” in the car on the way home.


Plan in advance. Whatever you do, don’t take your three children who found a rogue packet of jelly sweets in the back of the car on the way there to the largest Tesco in the land and make up the menu while pushing the trolley through the toy aisle.


Don’t punch above your weight. I’ve never made a soufflé so this is not the time to start.


Bake a cake. This is more for a daytime event, but having a cake in the oven makes both an amazing, welcoming smell as they come in – and you look good. Plus you can get all the kids to ice it later on, thus appearing like a top mum and saving yourself the embarrassment of making a hash of it yourself (or is that just me?).


Sweep everything from surfaces into drawers. Try and ignore all the stuff shoved in there from your last Christmas tidy-up. Bills over 12 months old don’t need to be paid, right?


Leave out a half-finished board game, giving the impression that your children have spent the day gainfully engaged. You definitely did not just turn off Frozen when the doorbell went.


Put chocolates on the pillow. Your sheets may have been dyed in the wash, but who’s going to notice with a bowl of Smarties on the bedside table?


Clear up while drunk. So much less painful than doing it with a hangover and the kids clamouring around your shaky knees.


Don’t fret about limes in the Corona: Quite a specific one this, but it saved me some angst and an hour of fruitless skewering – I checked and it’s OK to recycle beer bottles with lime inside. Yes! Just in case you’re planning a Mexican-themed evening!


Focus on the fun not the food. It’s New Year’s Eve! Who cares if pudding is a load of leftover cheese and a box of chocolates with only the coffee crèmes left?


Happy New Year’s Eve!

You can follow Jess’ blog Wry Mummy on facebook and twitter.


Will you be hosting a party this year?


You can read previous guest posts from the Rookie Mistakes series here.

If you are a blogger and wish to take part in the series you can find out more here.

For more from Life, Love and Dirty Dishes follow my social networks, or subscribe by clicking here.



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3 Comments on Rookie Mistakes – A Guest Post by Wry Mummy

  1. Rhyming with wine
    December 17, 2015 at 6:22 am (10 months ago)

    Fantastic tips. I may have to print this and pin it to my fridge to be followed to the letter! *runs to buy an apron. And flour* 😉

    Brilliant! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and yours.

    Dawn x
    Rhyming with wine recently posted…Merry Christmas xMy Profile

  2. fionnuala
    December 17, 2015 at 5:20 am (10 months ago)

    Excellent tips Jess. The tidying up trick is a favourite of mine, as is the apron-wearing.


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