There are many complexities of
owning being owned by a toddler. They’re a strange creature never fully understood by the rest of the world. A fierce streak of independence, a distinct lack of compliance, and the propensity to change their mind more often than their nappy. However there are 10 definite must haves for any self respecting toddler in any toddlerhood.
1 Toddlers Must Have A Stick
A must have for all toddlers when walking any distance is a stick. the bigger the better. Any toddler worth their salt also knows that upon arrival at destination it will be insisted that the stick remains in their possession. Any requests / distraction methods / bribery employed by a grown up to encourage the toddler to drop the stick will be met with a full blown tantrum. When it comes to sticks toddlers are very similar to puppies.
2 Toddlers Must Have Wellies
Whether you are in your comfy onesie or dressed to impress, the appropriate footwear for any toddler is wellies. Irrespective of the weather or the destination, indoors or outdoors, the footwear of choice will always be wellies.
3 Toddlers Must Have Unruly Hair
It is unknown what happens to toddlers when they sleep but the term ‘bed head’ was coined to describe their morning look. And short of a full on hair wash and blow dry there is little you can do to tame the wild mane. Hats or an abundance of frozen hair clips are the only option.
4 Toddlers Must Have Sticky Hands
It is well documented that Toddlers are mini tornadoes, and leave a mess in their wake wherever they go. They also always have sticky hands that leave prints on mirrors, glass, walls and clothes. More often than not the substance that has caused the sticky hand is unknown and it is only the really brave parent who really wants to know.
5 Toddlers Must Have Boogers
Whether it’s running down their face in a big slug trail, or they’re rooting around for it themselves, no toddler is complete without a booger or two.
6 Toddlers Must Have The Ability To Say No
The most used word in the toddler vocabulary and a must have in their arsenal of attack. Used anywhere, any time and in any situation. Even when they actually mean ‘Yes’.
7 Toddlers Must Have Impractical Toys
An essential item for any outing is a toy. The toy the toddler chooses falls into one of two categories:
- The most prized possession. The one they cannot sleep without. The one thing they have loved unconditionally with all their hearts since they were tiny. The one irreplaceable thing you never want to leave the house for fear of it being lost, along with any hope of a full nights sleep ever again.
- The most impractical toy they could choose. If you are off to the local library or to visit great nanny in the nursing home, it will be the loudest toy on earth. Off for a spot of shopping then it will be the biggest thing they can find, which of course you will end up carrying along with the shopping.
8 Toddlers Must Have A Passion for Drama
Toddlers know how to attract an audience and put on an Oscar winning performance at a moments notice. Woe betide you stop them from picking up that piece of dog crap at the park. They can produce real tears, and morph into a devil like character before your very eyes.
9 Toddlers Must Have A Stubborn Streak
With that stubborn streak comes the ability to lay in the middle of the pavement for a ridiculous amount of time. Parents of toddlers demonstrating their stubborn streak can often be heard saying, “Bye then, Mummy’s going now, bye” with little or no effect. The stubborn streak can also be exerted when it comes to wearing clothes. The toddlers preferred attire to be naked whatever the weather. The stubborn streak is always attributed by parents to the parent not dealing with the current stubborn episode.
10 Toddlers Must Have The Cutest Smile
For all their crazy shenanigans and stead fast determination, one flash of that cheeky grin and all is forgiven. It’s one of their most powerful weapons. And boy do they know how to use it.
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